Title: "Smokin' In The Boys Room"
Written by: Ging
Date: 1999
Air Date: N/A
Rating: PG-13 (For references to drug use.)
Series: FRVS - Episode #021
Spoilers: None, we try to create our own stuff... but remember sometimes we have to refer to happenings in the actual show "The X-Files".
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Author's Note: The personalities of the characters within the world of "Fox & Rat" are not those you know from "The X-Files" television series. We have warped them and given them a common past, immature behavior and a sense of humor. Any horrid behavior should not be mimicked in your every day life.
Summary: Mulder, Krycek and Spender get up to a little mischief!
Dana Scully was wandering down a hallway within the J.Edgar Hoover Building, minding her own business, when she noticed smoke billowing from beneath the doors of the mens' toilets. Scully paused, and sniffed. It really smelt like, but surely it couldn't be ... marijuana!! Slowly Scully approached the doors, and listened. From inside, she could hear loud laughter, and Alex Krycek's distinct voice call out -
"Hey, Mulder! Pass the dutchie from the left-hand side!"
Scully clearly heard her partner snigger, then Krycek add, "No, stupid! That's your right-hand, I said left-hand! Oh, never mind, just give it too me, Mulder!"
The sniggering became louder, then Jeffrey Spender called out, "Hey, guys! No fair! Give it too me, Mulder, Krycek ... come on!"
"No way, Spender!" Krycek giggled, "This baby is mine! Besides, I think you've had way too much already!"
"Awww ... but, Alex! I want some more!!" Spender made a feeble grab at Krycek's hand. Mulder stumbled in front of Krycek, and gazed almost cross-eyed back at Spender. "Uh, uh, Spender" he began, "If you smoke any more of that stuff, then we'll have to start calling you the Reefer Toking Man!"
"Oh ha ha, Mulder" sneered Spender, "Bite me!"
Mulder began to snigger again, and slapped Spender hard on the shoulder, "No thanks" he gagged, "I've already had lunch ... well ... I think I did ... " Mulder swung around to face Krycek. "Hey!" he unnecessarily yelled, "Did I eat lunch today!?!"
"How the hell should I know!" Krycek yelled back.
"Why are we yelling?" Spender wanted to know with a yell. Just as Mulder opened his mouth to comment, the doors to the mens' toilets swung open, and a small figure entered the room in a haze of smoke.
"It's an alien!" Mulder suddenly shrieked, "A real-life, genuine little alien .... !"
"Oh, cut the crap, Mulder, it's me!" said Scully in disgusted tones as she took in the state of the three men. "Aliens do not exist!" She then turned on her heel and exited the toilets, slamming the doors behind her as she left.
THE END.
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