Title: "Two Guys, A Waitress And A Lie"
Written by: Cassie & Kristi
Date: March 17, 2002, June 28, 2002
Air Date: November 18, 2002
Rating: PG
Series: FRVS - Episode #088
Spoilers: Past episodes of FRVS may be spoiled.
Feedback: We love it. Please e-mail us at frvs.feedback@gmail.com (please include the episode name in the subject) Thank you.
Archiving: "Fox & Rat" Virtual Series only!
Disclaimer: We do not own anyone. They belong to Chris Carter, Ten-Thirteen Productions, and 20th Century FOX Broadcasting.
Author's Note: The personalities of the characters within the world of "Fox & Rat" are not those you know from "The X-Files" television series. We have warped them and given them a common past, immature behavior and a sense of humor. Any horrid behavior should not be mimicked in your every day life.
Summary: Krycek feels he and Doggett need to get to know each other better and the result is Doggett going out on a date with a waitress named "Danielle".Zeke Ramone's Review:
Krycek is having a "maturing" moment on this day and asks Doggett to hang with him. The episode title explains it's self... two guys, a waitress... but a white lie. A great little episode with a bundle of laughs, and smacks on the forehead in this new episode of "Fox & Rat"...
FADE IN:
INT. DOGGETT’S HOUSE – SATURDAY AFTERNOON
We hear a loud vacuum cleaner as we move into the living room, we see Doggett vacuuming and feather dusting his furniture at the same time. His TV is on, “Casablanca” is playing in the VCR.
Buddy – his cute puppy beagle dog - is following Doggett, constantly at his heels. He’s dangerously close to being stepped on quite a few times. Doggett turns off the vacuum for a beat and turns his attention to the TV.
DOGGETT
(with the movie)
Here’s lookin’ at you kid.
He turns the vacuum back on and continues his cleaning. CUT TO:
INT. MULDER/KRYCEK’S APARTMENT – SATURDAY AFTERNOON
We’re in the boy’s bedroom. Krycek is sleeping on the top part of his and Mulder’s bunk bed. Krycek slowly awakes, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He jumps out of bed and stands in the middle of the room, looking around. Mulder’s choo-choo train is set up and moving in the middle of the room. Krycek grabs a dinosaur figurine and places it on the track. The train runs it over. Krycek gives us an evil laugh.
CUT TO:
INT. DOGGETT’S HOUSE – LIVING ROOM
Doggett is seated on his stairs, cleaning them with the cleaning tools of his vacuum cleaner. Buddy sits at the bottom of the steps. All of a sudden, Buddy runs to the phone and stands by it and barks rather loudly.
Though the vacuum cleaner is loud, Doggett hears the barking and turns off the cause of noise.
DOGGETT
Buddy?
Then the phone rings, Doggett quickly makes his way down the stairs to answer it.
DOGGETT
Hello?
KRYCEK
(filtered)
Hey Doggett, it’s Krycek.
DOGGETT
What’s up?
KRYCEK
(filtered)
We don’t do much together, do we?
Doggett nudges Buddy off of his coffee table as he takes a seat on his couch.
DOGGETT
I guess we don’t, why?
KRYCEK
Do you want to go get some
coffee or something? Get to
know one another better.
DOGGETT
I don’t see why not.
CUT TO: INT. MULDER/KRYCEK’S APARTMENT
Krycek jumps a little, then composes himself from his excitement of making plans to hang out with someone mature..
KRYCEK
Great! I know this awesome
coffee shop down on eleventh street.
DOGGETT
(filtered)
Sounds great.
CUT TO: INT. CORNER STREET COFFEE SHOP – 3 PM
Doggett and Krycek walk in, both are dressed in casual wear (jeans, t-shirts and leather jackets). Krycek hasn’t yet noticed that he and Doggett have similar jackets. Oh! Then he does!
KRYCEK
Hey look. We’re both wearing
the same jacket, we’re already
bonding.They take a seat at a table in the middle of the coffee shop.
A waitress comes to their table, her back toward us. We see the guys on both sides of her, looking up in skeptical disbelief.
POV – DOGGETT/KRYCEK
The waitress looks 100% exactly like Dana Scully, except her hair is pulled back in a ponytail and she’s wearing her glasses.
NOTE TO READER: Yes, this is actually Dana Scully.
Scully hasn’t yet noticed who she is waiting on.
SCULLY
(looking down at notepad)
Are you ready to order?
Doggett and Krycek share a look, she hasn’t recognized them yet, maybe it isn’t Scully…
DOGGETT
Coffee. Decaf.
KRYCEK
Same.
Scully looks up, wide-eyed, upon hearing their voices. Oh no… they’ve found her at her “second job”… well it’s really just extra credit from her cooking class, she needs all the bonus points she can get. She nods at the guys, to indicate she got their order and she turns on her heel and hurries herself away.
Doggett and Krycek share a look, they wait until she is out of earshot before speaking.
KRYCEK
Oh my God! She looks
exactly like Scully!
DOGGETT
I know!
KRYCEK
Maybe she has a sister.
Ya know, a twin or somethin’.
DOGGETT
(thinking out the possibility)
She’s never mentioned having a twin.
KRYCEK
Maybe she doesn’t know about her.
Marita recently told me about her
twin, Maria.
Scully starts to walk back over to them with their drinks. She has a strange look on her face… she must have been wondering why Doggett is hanging out with Krycek… Krycek whacks Doggett on his arm.
KRYCEK
Dude. You should ask her out.
Doggett shoots a look.
DOGGETT
What? Are you crazy?
KRYCEK
It would make our Scully jealous.
DOGGETT
Why would I want to do that?
KRYCEK
(duh. It’s so obvious)
Because you like her.
DOGGETT
(lying)
I do not.
KRYCEK
Yes. You do. (beat)
Just do it.
Scully reaches their table, and can sense something is up. Since the guys haven’t said anything to acknowledge they have noticed her, she doesn’t acknowledge them. She places their drinks on the table in front of them. Krycek stands up. Doggett shoots him a look.
KRYCEK
Well… I’ve gotta go to the bathroom.
Krycek walks away and instead of going to the back where the restrooms are, he goes outside the shop and watches Doggett from the window. Scully gives him a weird look, then decides that they haven’t recognized her because of what she looks like here than on any other normal day either in the office or out. She is about to leave their table when:
DOGGETT
Miss?
Scully stops dead in her tracks, thinking she’s been had. Thank goodness she’s been had by John Doggett, he doesn’t have a blabber mouth. At least the whole FBI won’t find out about this side job. She turns to face him.
SCULLY
Yes?
DOGGETT
What’s your name?
Oh crap. What to say.
SCULLY
(almost says “Dana”)
Dan- Danielle.
DOGGETT
Danielle… that’s a pretty name.
SCULLY
(not sure what to do)
Uh… thank you.
She smiles and turns again to leave the awkward situation.
DOGGETT
Are you busy tomorrow night?
Slowly and yet mischievously, Scully turns around. How to play this one…?
SCULLY
(playing “shy”)
No…
DOGGETT
Would you like to go out for
dinner or a drink? I know this
little place called Hard Eight Lounge
down on 87th and Main. You know it?
SCULLY
(hesitant)
Yeah… I’ve been there once or twice.
DOGGETT
We can meet there at seven tomorrow,
if that’s okay with you.
SCULLY
That would be great. I’ll see you then.
DOGGETT
I can’t wait. (beat) By the way,
my name is John.
He stands up and reaches out to shake her hand.
SCULLY
Nice to meet you.
She walks away, confused as to why she just did this to Doggett and to herself. What was she thinking? Especially knowing, that he may have something for her, but what of her for him. Oh no… no, this isn’t a good idea. Too late now, there’s no lying to John Doggett without it’s consequences. She places her serving tray down on a counter and leaves to go be confused about her current situation in the employee break room. Meanwhile, Krycek happily comes bouncing back into the coffee shop. All proud of Doggett being able to ask a woman out.
KRYCEK
(pats Doggett on the back)
I knew you could do it, man!
DOGGETT
I’m still not sure I see the point.
KRYCEK
She’s hot!
TIME CUT: INT. MULDER/KRYCEK’S APARTMENT – 5 PM
Everyone is there. Mulder is the only one wearing his bright lime green Super Buddies t-shirt. There are snacks and sodas on the coffee table.
MULDER
(only one standing/addresses group)
The meeting is about to begin.
SKINNER
Why do we have to do this today?
MULDER
Because.
MONICA
Let’s get started so we can go.
SCULLY
We have to wait for Krycek and John.
Right on cue, Doggett and Krycek enter. Mulder looks happy to see them. Krycek stops as he enters the living room.
MULDER
Come on it guys.
KRYCEK
What the hell is going on?
MULDER
A Super Buddies meeting.
Krycek makes an annoyed face. Doggett shuts the door to the apartment. Unamused, they enter.
MULDER
Now that everybody is here. I’d like
to bring up an issue that has been
disturbing some members of Super
Buddies for quite some time. Ok so
it’s just me it’s been disturbing, but I
still think my feelings are important.
(beat) I seem to be the only person
who ever wears the Super Buddy t-shirt.
They all groan. Krycek looks inspired, he elbows Doggett who is standing next to him.
KRYCEK
I’ve got something better to
announce. (beat) Mr. Celibate
here, John Doggett, has a date
tomorrow night.
The room erupts, ruining Mulder’s meeting plans. Doggett’s face and ears go red.
MONICA
You’re kidding?! After nearly ten years
of no relationship or dates, and you’ve asked
someone out, just like that?! I’m proud of you,
Johnny. Maybe that nine year dry spell – if you
know what I mean – will be over. (beat) So what
is her name? Where’d you find her? You didn’t
pick her up on the corner of a street, did you?
The whole room is quite now, at the mention of a “dry spell”… Mulder whispers to Marita if she thinks that means he hasn’t been drinking water as he should. Marita corrects him and tells him that she thinks Monica is referring to Doggett’s lack of a sex life for the past decade. Ahhh… Mulder sits down and listens, suddenly interested.
DOGGETT
I did not pick her up on a street –
MONICA
- That’s right, that was Mexico ’84…
SKINNER
(amused)
Tell us more about that.
DOGGETT
No. (beat) Her name is Danielle, and
she works at this little coffee shop
downtown, that Krycek and I went to
earlier today –
MULDER
- That brings up another issue. When a
member of Super Buddies hangs out with
another member of Super Buddies, everyone
has to go too!
No one listens to Mulder. Krycek looks at him blankly.
SKINNER
That’s great Doggett.
MARITA
(very optimistic and happy)
Yes. Maybe you’ll marry her.
Krycek laughs out loud.
KRYCEK
Here’s the interesting thing…
she looks exactly (chuckles) like Scully.
Everyone goes quiet and they all simultaneously look over to Scully. Scully says nothing. She’s been ignoring this whole conversation and occupying herself with Chex Mix.
MONICA
(nosey/prying)
Dana…?
Scully looks up at them, acting oblivious.
SCULLY
What?
MONICA
You’ve been quiet. Is there anything
you’d like to add?
SCULLY
About what?
MARITA
- Doggett’s date looking just like you.
SCULLY
Hmmm… that’s nice.
Scully picks up a magazine that’s on the coffee table and sits down on the couch and opens it and holds it up to cover her face, so no one can see her. How embarrassing if they knew… oh god.
MULDER
(out of the blue)
Sex… is that like a new alcoholic
beverage and John here needs it to
get over being dehydrated?
KRYCEK
(ignoring Mulder)
I was thinkin’ that maybe you had
a twin sister. Only (chuckles) she’s
hotter than you.
Scully throws the magazine on the coffee table, she hates when these people pick on her like this.
SCULLY
So what if I have a twin sister!
She stands up and nervously runs her hand through her hair. She paces the room. Why did she have to lie to those guys? She’s so terrible!
MARITA
(disbelief)
You have a twin sister too?
DOGGETT
(sensitive to Scully’s feelings)
Hey look, if you’re uncomfortable with it
I can just not show up.
Scully stops pacing. Why is Doggett being so considerate of what she may feel if she really did have a twin sister that he was going to go out with?
SCULLY
She may be my sister, but you don’t have
to do that. I think you should know though,
that she’s kind of a bitch.
DOGGETT
Really? She seemed pretty nice, well
from what I could tell.
KRYCEK
(smirking)
She’s probably better in bed than you too.
Oops, he didn’t mean to say that bit out loud. Everyone gives him weird looks, he has a sort of constipated look on his face.
KRYCEK
What I meant was… one would think
she would be better in bed than you would be…
Monica shakes her head, boy these people can be weird.
MULDER
This is all very exciting, but we still
have a meeting to get through.
KRYCEK
Don’t you get it? No one cares
about this stupid meeting.
Mulder sits and pouts. CUT TO:
NEXT DAY
INT. SCULLY/MARITA/MONICA’S APARTMENT – 5 PM
Marita and Monica are in the living room playing a game of chess.
MARITA
(making a move)
C4 takes D3.
Marita takes one of Monica’s pawns with her bishop piece.
MONICA
What’s with the Battleship terminology?
MARITA
(saddened)
I’ve been told I play this all wrong…
Scully walks through the room quickly, she’s wearing a nice dress that’s a bit more conservative than she’d normally wear. Monica and Marita notice this and share a look.
MARITA
Dana, honey? Where are you going tonight?
I thought we all agreed that tonight was
Girls Night? No need to get all pretty in a
nice blue dress.
Scully goes into her room, desperation on her face, trying to think of an excuse (but not once thinking of just ditching Doggett and blaming it on her “bitch of a sister”).
MONICA
(quiet to Marita)
What do you think she’s up to?
MARITA
(loud whisper)
I’m not sure.
MONICA
You don’t think she’s going to spy
on Johnny and his new chick, do you?
MARITA
She’s not that pathetic.
Scully comes back out, she’s added some makeup and she’s done her hair. She poses for them.
SCULLY
This doesn’t scream “slut”, does it?
She turns around in a circle for them to see all angles.
MONICA
(curious)
Why?
Frustrated, Scully gives in. She sits down on the couch.
SCULLY
Fine. I have a date.
Marita and Monica smile.
MONICA
With who?
SCULLY
Oh… this Italian guy I met
on the subway the other day.
MARITA
You’re gonna get lucky, I hear
Italian guys are famous for their
kinky sex acts.
Marita giggles, and then places her hand innocently over her mouth. Did she say that? No…. Monica and Scully look at her oddly. Did Marita just say that?
SCULLY
Um… if that happens. I promise we
won’t end up here, no need for the
two of you to leave on my account.
Honestly though, I know that won’t
happen, he’s not really my type… I think…
MARITA
Well that’s just swell.
Off their looks CUT TO: INT. HARD EIGHT LOUNGE – 7 PM
This is a rough looking bar, not a lounge. Smokey air and dim lights. Loud music for the depressed and uninspired is playing. Scully is waiting for Doggett at the bar, sipping on a glass of water (she will not drink, she doesn’t want to let him know she’s not really “Danielle”). In the background we see Doggett enter. He pauses, allowing his eyes to adjust, he sees “Danielle” alone at the bar… looking a little sad. He approaches the bar.
DOGGETT
(yelling out over the music)
Danielle!
Scully has forgotten she is “Danielle” for the night, she’s caught up in her own thoughts of being single and having lost Walter Skinner to Marita, which was all fine and dandy, but she’s not getting any younger and nowadays less and less amount of men are paying any attention to her. Compared to the other women in the bar, she probably looks like a bore. Doggett sits next to her.
DOGGETT
(taps her shoulder)
Danielle.
Scully turns to face him, just now remembering her “twin sister’s” name.
SCULLY
Hi John…
She notices he’s wearing nice clothes… light blue… that does wonders for him. She gives him a smile and he returns it.
DOGGETT
You didn’t have a problem findin’
the place, did ya?
SCULLY
I told ya, I’ve been here a couple
times before. (beat) Why don’t we grab
a table and ya know… get to know
each other better.
They move to an empty table in the middle of the room. CUT TO:
INT. MULDER/KRYCEK’S APARTMENT
They are bummed out on the couch watching TV.
KRYCEK
We should invite Skinner over, if the girls
can have Girls Night Out, I think us guys
could have Guys Night Out and watch
Baywatch the entire time.
MULDER
If it were Guys Night, Doggett would have
to be here too.
KRYCEK
(jealous)
If Scully’s sister is anything like Scully,
Doggett’s gonna get lucky, while we
sit here doing nothing.
MULDER
You should really be nicer when
you speak of Scully. She’s not
some kind of whore you know.
They sit there, expressionless for a beat.
MULDER
Wanna call a stripper?
Krycek grabs the phone and hits speed dial. CUT TO:
INT. SCULLY/MARITA/MONICA’S APARTMENT – KITCHEN
Monica and Marita are getting some snacks. Marita finds some microwave popcorn. Monica is getting diet Cokes.
MARITA
I’m glad we’re having our
Girls Night. We don’t need Dana.
MONICA
You’re not jealous of her, are you?
MARITA
Why would I be jealous
of Dana on a date with a hot Italian
man?
MONICA
I don’t know. Maybe because she’s on
a date with a hot Italian guy.
Marita stares off into nothingness.
MONICA
Marita? Are you okay?
Marita sighs.
MARITA
I’m never going to find
the perfect man…
MONICA
What are you talking about?
MARITA
You have Robert, Dana has her Italian
Man, John has Danielle… and I have no one.
She takes a seat at the dining room table.
MONICA
(stating a fact)
Marita, you’re with Walter.
A beat.
MARITA
Oh yeah… he gave me a kiss
last night, right?
MONICA
Yes. He did.
MARITA
The motive behind that scares me, Monica.
Marita starts to cry. She gets up and wobbles over to the couch and picks up Kitty her white cat.
MONICA
Oh Marita… everything will be okay…
MARITA
No it won’t.
MONICA
Yes it will.
MARITA
No it won’t.
MONICA
Yes it – (beat) Marita? Why
do you think that?
MARITA
I like men from other countries.
Why else do you think I had my
Daddy get me in the U.N.?!
Monica pauses to think what she’s gonna say to that. She figures it’s best to ignore that last comment. So she comes up with another rational reason for Marita’s outburst.
MONICA
This isn’t about going back to Krycek, is it?
Off Marita’s “kinda” look: CUT TO:
INT. HARD EIGHT LOUNGE – 9 PM
“Danielle” and Doggett’s date is going very well. They seem a little tipsy, they’ve had just enough to drink. They are laughing. Doggett just told a joke about a man who walked into the bar and ended up making the bartender happy after pissing all over the place.
SCULLY
(laughing hard)
Oh God! That is the funniest-
DOGGETT
(laughing hard)
- I know!
They laugh again. Scully takes another drink, they calm down a bit. Doggett’s eyes have locked with Scully’s. He’s giving her a “sexy” look. This makes her a bit uncomfortable… she’s not sure why, she can normally flirt with any man in her presence.
DOGGETT
I’m sorry. I have to be truthful. That’s not
an original John Doggett joke, it’s from
the Robert Rodriguez film “Desperado”.
SCULLY
I know. I enjoy that joke more than I should.
DOGGETT
You find a piss joke funny?
Scully giggles and nods her head “yes”. There’s a beat as Doggett thinks of a new topic of conversation, and since he’s not thinking clearly:
DOGGETT
I know your twin sister.
This quickly sobers Scully up a bit.
SCULLY
Really?
DOGGETT
Yeah… Dana Scully. We work in
the same division at the FBI.
SCULLY
Oh she’s doin’ the FBI now. Last
I heard she was doin’ her teachers.
DOGGETT
What?
SCULLY
Oh yeah… you don’t know about that…
She ponders for a moment.
SCULLY
So what do you think of my sister?
Scully sips from her drink.
DOGGETT
Well, um… she’s nice. (beat)
I’m not sure what you think
of her, but she’s a great friend.
SCULLY
Do you think she’s pretty?
Doggett eyes her suspiciously.
DOGGETT
Well, yeah. I guess. I mean I did ask you
out ‘cause you caught my eye. (beat)
Why are you so interested in your sister?
SCULLY
Oh… I haven’t seen her since we were
little girls in um… pre-school.
DOGGETT
(not sure if he believes this tall tale)
Ok.
Now it’s awkward , Doggett remembered her “doin’ teachers” comment, a pre-schooler wouldn’t even know what that was nonetheless do something like that at that age. Scully grabs her stomach, she isn’t feeling well anymore, she stands up and digs into her purse and hands him her credit card.
SCULLY
I feel ill. Give this to the waiter.
I’ll pay for my half.
She scurries off to the little girls room. Doggett looks down at her card and sees “Dana Katherine Scully”. He puts it in his wallet and gives the waiter his card to pay for them both. After the card is returned, he gets up and heads toward the restrooms. Scully comes out.
DOGGETT
Feel better?
She nods her head “yes”, her face is a little pale. Doggett puts his arm over her shoulder and they leave the bar.
DOGGETT
Look… it’s late and I know you probably
walked here or somethin’. I can take you home,
ya know, just to be safe.
SCULLY
Thanks… but are you sure you
should be driving?
DOGGETT
You’re right… let’s take the subway.
Doggett leaves his car downtown for the night, best to be safe than sorry. Especially when you could be endangering your life and the life of a friend. CUT TO:
INT. MULDER/KRYCEK’S APARTMENT – 9:33 PM
Krycek is wearing a birthday party hat and a stripper is dancing on the coffee table. Mulder is stuffing money in the strippers g-string.
CUT TO:
INT. SCULLY/MARITA/MONICA’S APARTMENT – 9:45 PM
Marita is still crying, she has confused herself about her life path. Monica is now in her pajamas, comforting her. Candles are lit and whale songs are being played in the stereo.
MONICA
You know, you really shouldn’t leave
Walter tonight… you may feel better in
the morning…
Scully walks in, they look up at her.
MONICA
Home already?
MARITA
And without the Italian guy?
SCULLY
(confused)
What Italian guy?
MARITA
Did you get ditched again?
SCULLY
No… what are you talking about?
MONICA
Your date with some Italian.
The guy that turned tonight into
a Marita Bawl Fest.
SCULLY
Oh, he wasn’t Italian, he is-
Scully covers her mouth and runs to the bathroom, they hear her hacking up. Ewww… She comes back out.
SCULLY
I’m going to bed, I don’t feel well.
MARITA/MONICA
Good night.
Marita suddenly looks much happier.
MARITA
Maybe foreign men are bad for us.
Monica rolls her eyes, this is the fifth time Marita has said something like that tonight. CUT TO:
NEXT DAY
INT. JANITOR’S LOUNGE – 9 AM
Monica and Alfredo are sitting on the couch eating chocolate covered donuts. Mulder and Krycek are playing ping-pong. Scully is taking a few asprin and is drinking water. Scully sits down at a table near the coffee machine. She opens up a newspaper.
The door opens and Doggett silently enters and sits down across from Scully.
MONICA
Heya Johnny! How was the date?
DOGGETT
Please. Speak quietly. I have a headache.
Scully slides the bottle of asprin across the table to him.
MONICA
(highly amused)
You mean you have a hangover?
Johnny John Jay Doggett… never in my
life would I have thought you’d do that again
especially after 1986.
Doggett gives her a look 1) to shut up 2) to back off he’s not in the mood to hear her blab to him about stupid drunken acts of the past. Monica puts her hands in the air, as a way of indicating she’s backing off.
KRYCEK
(laughs)
Guess what happened last night.
ALFREDO
Do we want to know?
MULDER
Krycek acted like it was his birthday
and got a stripper for free.
KRYCEK
(proud)
Yeah buddy!
MONICA
(sarcastic)
You’re so mature.
Scully leaves the room, holding her head. She’s had enough of this. Doggett gets up and follows her. CUT TO:
INT. SCULLY/MULDER/KRYCEK’S OFFICE
Scully is sitting at Mulder’s desk, holding her head in her hands. Doggett enters.
DOGGETT
Agent Scully?
SCULLY
(looks up)
Yeah?
DOGGETT
(shuts the door)
I know it was you last night.
Scully looks up at him.
SCULLY
What are you talking about?
Doggett pulls out his wallet and takes out her forgotten credit card. He places it on her desk.
DOGGETT
You forgot this at the bar.
SCULLY
(high tone of voice, she’s been had)
Darn that sister of mine.
She takes the credit card and puts it in her wallet.
DOGGETT
Why’d you do that?
SCULLY
What?
DOGGETT
Say you were your sister.
Scully turns around in her seat to look at Mulder’s “I Want To Believe” poster.
SCULLY
Ok, I’ll tell you. (turns to face him)
As long as you don’t tell anyone. (beat)
I didn’t want anyone to know I work
in that coffee shop, so I made up that
twin story to throw you all off.
DOGGETT
(loud whisper)
Why are you embarrassed about that?
SCULLY
(loud whisper)
Because I suck at cooking and
I needed extra credit for my class.
DOGGETT
(loud whisper)
You don’t suck.
SCULLY
(normal tone)
Yes I do – You’re forgetting
something here, why did you
ask me out?
DOGGETT
That’s different!
SCULLY
How so?
DOGGETT
Your hair was pulled back and you
were wearing glasses. (beat) I wasn’t
sure it was you.
SCULLY
So you asked me out to embarrass me?
DOGGETT
(lying/ doesn’t want to explain)
I have to go to a meeting now.
He tries to leave the office but Scully runs to the door and blocks him.
SCULLY
There’s no meeting today.
DOGGETT
Ok. Fine.
They stand there quietly, he’s unable to look at her, she’s staring at his face.
MONICA
(off screen/outside the door)
Come on, settle this now, SOLDIER!
DOGGETT
(embarrassed)
Will you stay out of this!
KRYCEK
(off screen/outside the door)
I made you ask her out because I know
Scully doesn’t have a twin sister.
DOGGETT
(angry)
Why didn’t you tell me?
KRYCEK
(off screen/ outside the door)
Because I thought it would be funny.
Scully is watching Doggett as he reacts to all of this. He seems to want to open the door, but knows he has been had by Krycek and that somehow Krycek’s evil plan has the better of Scully and caught her in the act of lying, which is all fine and dandy, but… gosh darn that Krycek! Doggett gives Scully a look that says he’ll never forgive Krycek for this one.
SCULLY
Alex!
She opens the door. Mulder, Krycek, Monica and Alfredo… they all stand there smirking and laughing at them. Frustrated. She slams the door on them. She and Doggett share a look. These people are so mean. Why are they picking on them so much? Tis best not to give them what they want, whatever that may be.
Doggett and Scully let out heavy sighs, and sit down at Mulder’s desk to throw some darts at the dartboard on the back of the office door.
Off the sexual tension that could have been brewing in the room had Doggett played his cards right:
FADE OUT:
THE END.
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