::: Ground Rules :::

KRYCEK: These are the ground rules we set for our apartment. Hm. Mulder?

MULDER: Yes?

KRYCEK: Now that our apartment is probably destroyed... do we need to make new ground rules for The Bunkie?

MULDER: No, I think we can just use them here too.

KRYCEK: Cool. And remember everyone, Rule #1 is THE most important!

Rule #1 you don't touch Marita.
Rule #2 don't just take things I buy. Food, magazines videos, nothin'. Don't use it without permission.
Rule #3 don't draw in my magazines.
Rule #4 What the hell are you doing with this?!
Rule #5 no making home porn videos that I can find.
Rule #6 Clean up your mess!
Rule #7 DON'T HURT ME PUNK!
Rule #8 DON'T CALL ME PUNK!
Rule #9 You have to be nice to the 'Birthday Boy'!
Rule #10 Don't you ever ever forget your friends birthday!
Rule #11 My birthday is January 28!
Rule #12 My birthday is October 13.
Rule #13 Don't eat my last piece of birthday cake!
Rule #14 Don't jump on my bed!
Rule #15 Don't open windows to make me cold!
Rule #16 Then don't jump on my bed!
Rule #17 Don't mimic what I say!
Rule #18 Rule #17: Don't mimic what I say!
Rule #19 Shut up when I tell you to.
Rule #20 Marita's mine!
Rule #21 No she's not, she's mine!
Rule #22 Don't be obsessive.
Rule #23 Don't be annoying.
Rule #24 Don't jab a knife into my stuffed bunny.
Rule #25 Don't have a stuffed bunny.
Rule #26 Don't throw my things away!
Rule #27 Don't move my favorite chair.
Rule #28 Give me back the essence to my chair!
Rule #29 Don't use my computer!
Rule #30 Don't spit on the floor.
Rule #31 Don't poke me with the pool cue.
Rule #32 Poke me Krycek!
Rule #33 Die!
Rule #34 Don't throw pool balls at me.
Rule #35 You never ever move our endpiece.
Rule #36 Don't leave when I'm talking to you!
Rule #37 Don't talk to me when I'm leaving.
Rule #38 I mean it, don't follow me!
Rule #39 No farting in the elevator.
Rule #40 No scaring the pretty girl in the elevator.
Rule #41 Leave me alone.
Rule #42 Hey! That's my apartment number!
Rule #43 Look when you drive!
Rule #44 Don't fall asleep when you drive.
Rule #45 Hey! That was only one time!
Rule #46 Stop at stop signs!
Rule #47 Don't aim at animals!
Rule #48 Don't tell me how to drive!
Rule #49 Don't listen to yodeling when I drive.
Rule #50 No singing with the yodeling in my presence!
Rule #51 Don't walk in front of me.
Rule #52 Open doors for your friends, Alex.
Rule #53 Don't call me Alex.
Rule #54 Don't slam doors on my face!
Rule #55 Don't act like our friendship is marriage.
Rule #56 Be nice to Bob.
Rule #57 Don't make me look stupid in front of other people.
Rule #58 We have to buy 'Lucky Charms' everytime we run out.
Rule #59 And 'Cheerios'
Rule #60 Don't call me names.
Rule #61 Don't use crayons on our floor.
Rule #62 Don't eat the crayons!
Rule #63 Remember, the PAM can is bug spray.
Rule #64 Throw out old food!
Rule #65 Turn off the oven.
Rule #66 Don't throw water on the oven to cool it down.
Rule #67 Turn off that music!
Rule #68 Don't tell me how to live.
Rule #69 Always have sex in the Love Room.
Rule #70 Hang up the phone when you are done with it.
Rule #71 Krycek always gets to use the phone at nine o'clock pm.
Rule #72 Can I use the phone at nine o'clock pm?
Rule #73 NO!
Rule #74 Lock the apartment doors at night.
Rule #75 And when we are gone.
Rule #76 I get to use the shower before you.
Rule #77 Don't use up all the hot water.
Rule #78 Don't flush the toilet when I'm in the shower.
Rule #79 Mulder gets to take a shower with Scully once in his life.
Rule #80 No...
Rule #81 Make me dinner.
Rule #82 Scully can never cook in our apartment.
Rule #83 Remember "Rule #1".
Rule #84 Don't tell me what to remember.
Rule #85 Keep the toilet seat up.
Rule #86 Pick up your mess in the bathroom, Krycek.
Rule #87 Don't hide my toothbrush.
Rule #88 Male dancers need to wear pants.
Rule #89 Don't invite male dancers to our apartment, Mulder.
Rule #90 What is that smell?
Rule #91 No playing with your blow-up toys.
Rule #92 By the way, where did my blow-up frog go?
Rule #93 Don't play or make paperdolls of Marita.
Rule #94 Don't find my paperdolls!
Rule #95 Grow up!
Rule #96 Don't tell me how to live again!
Rule #97 If Scully calls here, tell her I love her.
Rule #98 Scully is Skinner's! Forever!
Rule #99 Tell me where you go when you go out.
Rule #100 Do you think we have enough rules?
Rule #101 There will never be enough rules.
Rule #102 Don't buy chocolate Mulder!
Rule #103 You don't have to eat it, Krycek!
Rule #104 Feed my fish if I'm not home by midnight.
Rule #105 Don't threaten to eat my fish if I'm not home by midnight!
Rule #106 Don't pop balloons. It hurts my ears.
Rule #107 Get ear plugs because I don't care!
Rule #108 OUCH! My ears!
Rule #109 Don't set the radio alarm clock on the yodeling station.
Rule #110 I'll get my own alarm clock.
Rule #111 Bed time is at eight o'clock pm when we have to work the next day.
Rule #112 On weekends, bedtime is 5 or 6 in the morning.
Rule #113 Wait a minute... eight? What are you on, crack?
Rule #114 When I want to sleep turn off your light.
Rule #115 Don't blare music when I'm trying to sleep!
Rule #116 No fake snoring!
Rule #117 No fake passing gas!
Rule #118 That wasn't fake...
Rule #119 Ewww...
Rule #120 I can't sleep in this room!
Rule #121 I want a glass of warm milk.
Rule #122 hehe... from Marita...
Rule #123 I said, "Rule #1"!
Rule #124 We need cheese.
Rule #125 We just went to the store, we're not going twice in one night.
Rule #126 Buy me my gas for my car.
Rule #127 I get to answer all the phone calls from all the pretty lady voices.
Rule #128 Don't subscribe to phone sex calls.
Rule #129 How about only on weekends?
Rule #130 No waking up before noon on weekends.
Rule #131 We must wear our stupidest PJ's on weekends.
Rule #132 I don't have stupid PJ's.
Rule #133 Watch cartoons on weekends.
Rule #134 Eat junk food on weekends.
Rule #135 Go to Manner's Bar on weekends.
Rule #136 Let me win pin ball games.
Rule #137 I get to drink a whole lot on weekends.
Rule #138 Don't get drunk on weekends.
Rule #139 Don't negate rules that we make.
Rule #140 Crap! We're gonna miss "Syndicate X"!
Rule #141 Don't miss "Syndicate X".
Rule #142 That's the best rule you've made all night.
Rule #143 Don't make fun of my other rules.
Rule #144 Don't make fun of my butt.
Rule #145 Don't tell me what I can and cannot make fun of.
Rule #146 Refer to "Rule #139
Rule #147 When we think someone suspicious is at the door, don't open it.
Rule #148 Never let a woman named Svetlana in.
Rule #149 You have to tell me who this Svetlana chick is...
Rule #150 I'd rather not.
Rule #151 Never ask Krycek about Svetlana.
Rule #152 Never say the name Svetlana in my presence.
Rule #153 Never get a dog.
Rule #154 Remember to ask Krycek why we can't have a dog.
Rule #155 Stop watching news re-runs.
Rule #156 Subscribe to the Playboy channel.
Rule #157 Yeah buddy.
Rule #158 Get me food too when I'm tired and watching tv.
Rule #159 Beer will be the substitute for milk.
Rule #160 It's not the same.
Rule #161 Yes it is...
Rule #162 Buy some milk.
Rule #163 I need sleep.
Rule #164 No buying bowls that make my food come alive.
Rule #165 Find out why the couch always seems brand new.
Rule #166 Marita says we can't go camping in the winter anymore.
Rule #167 Spiders are not going to kill Mulder.
Rule #168 Krycek always kills spiders.
Rule #169 Never go on blind dates that Spender sets up.
Rule #170 Or Frohike.
Rule #171 You and Scully can't scare me like that again.
Rule #172 Our website is the best!
Rule #173 Yeah buddy!
Rule #174 Thank you Ahchoo and Ahsneeze!
Rule #175 Don't ever get a pet monkey again.
Rule #176 Slap my monkey...
Rule #177 SHUT UP!
Rule #178 No more dragging me on weird road trips.
Rule #179 Always wear your Super Buddies t-shirt when we are on Super Buddies outings.
Rule #180 Destroy Super Buddies.
Rule #181 Don't state that 15 year old skaters are hot.
Rule #182 Stop lying to me! Marita doesn't have another boyfriend!
Rule #183 Don't be delusional, Krycek.
Rule #184 I said never to let Svetlana in.
Rule #185 And I said never to let Scully cook in our apartment.
Rule #186 Tell me what that means.
Rule #187 Never celebrate New Years Eve again.
Rule #188 Never tell Doggett we copied videos.
Rule #189 Tell Marita that the "thankful for" is for Thanksgiving and not New Years.
Rule #190 Be nice to Marita.
Rule #191 Don't speak Russian in front of me.
Rule #192 Don't kiss me Krycek!
Rule #193 Scully and Skinner can't do it on our table.
Rule #194 Find out why Marita kept barking at Doggett.
Rule #195 Tell Doggett about Rule #1.
Rule #196 Help me clean the apartment!
Rule #197 Learn to turn off a vacuum.
Rule #198 Don't use my pen.
Rule #199 Don't chew on my pencil.
Rule #200 Don't eat paper.
Rule #201 Buy gum.
Rule #202 Dana Scully thinks you guys have too many rules and need help.
Rule #203 Alex Krycek can't be obsessive over me (Marita Lynn Covarrubias) anymore.
Rule #204 Clean your apartment.
Rule #205 Please...
Rule #206 Give Marita and Dana $1million!
Rule #207 Mulder can't pick team names.
Rule #208 Krycek gets to mud wrestle with Dana and Marita sometime in his life... alone.
Rule #209 She is my lust buddy.
Rule #210 Who is 'she', Krycek?
Rule #211 Never try to mow Doggett's lawn when it's winter.
Rule #212 Don't throw snowballs in my face, it hurts.
Rule #213 Don't help me pack my underwear!
Rule #214 Don't throw my suitcase out the window.
Rule #215 Remember to destroy Super Buddies.
Rule #216 Ask Doggett where we are going...
Rule #217 Don't sing!
Rule #218 You can't make rules without my rationalized approval.
Rule #219 No Super Buddy activities/adventures can physically or mentally harm any species on the planet or in the universe.
Rule #220: Krycek doesn't have to listen to Rule #219 because he hates Super Buddies, and doesn't care.
Rule #221: Krycek can be hateful whenever he wants to!
Rule #222: Monica thinks you boys should grow up a little.
Rule #223: Tell Robert Alfredo about Rule #1.
Rule #224: Make sure Krycek behaves on Goofy Spooky.
Rule #225: Don't tell me how to behave!
Rule #226: That reminds me, don't unplug my computer again!
Rule #227: Don't beat me up for unplugging your computer.
Rule #228: Find out who this Westly guy is and kill him for having to marry Marita.
Rule #229: Don't kill anyone.
Rule #230: Find out how other people have added their rules to OUR ground rules.
Rule #231: It's OK to cry while watching the movie "Ghost".
Rule #232: Don't tell anyone that Krycek cried while watching "Ghost".
Rule #233: You can't interrupt Mulder when he's speaking.
Rule #234: Never call me roomie again.
Rule #235: Mulder is the man in this relationship!
Rule #236: I'm DA MAN!
Rule #237: No you're not.
Rule #238: Don’t throw lamps at the TV.
Rule #239: I can do what I want.
Rule #240: No you can’t
Rule #241: Yes I can.
Rule #242: No you can’t.
Rule #243: Remember rule #236.
Rule #244: Mulder and Krycek have to shut up when we’re watching TV.